Bloomy or Gloomy !

My First Period Story

When Spring suddenly changes to winter. Those flowers just ready to bloom fades before living. It was such a happy  Spring morning like every single other mornings where I would be found jumping like a bee in a flower. It was more joyous day for the family person like me  where my elders have planned a family gathering at my house ,I was so excited to meet my every siblings moreover I was waiting for what was the next memory to be added with these crazy peoples. It was a usual school day , I was preparing for my school when I suddenly started to feel unusual with my stomach but who cares it must be the reaction of happiness going inside. I went to school and It was 3rd Period when my stomach pain got worst, I thought like the germs inside me were trying to kill me. My friend knew that I was in a huge pain so she went to the Health Room and brought some hot water and painkillers for me. I felt relieved for few hours . I was in 8th grade and my friends  had even started to imagine  the worst thing to happen ‘Periods’ because I was  the only one left to have my first periods . I know about  menstruations but I was like,” No God, I am not ready now.” Nothing happened the whole day except for those fears and pain.

I went home and told my mom about my horrible day. Like Every Nepali Mom my mom also started to blame me for all those fast foods, junk foods and chatpat. Can you speak anything when you hear these words? Okay, now I feel better. It was six in the evening, everyone gathered and we talked , laughed . We dined at 8. We kids ( not by age but kids of parents) were in the next room doing some funny stuffs, laughing and shouting . Suddenly, I felt like I peed my pants. Oh, So Embarrassing . I cant say them that I am peeing being a 8th grader but rather I started to think about making my way out of there . I was  just getting out of the room when my sixth grade sister shouted , “Did you fall in the ditch?”. Then I  got everyone’s attention and everyone saw some brownish red thing in my pants so called stains . I was all red by the time and I thought may because of the light they mistook it and I made an excuse of cleaning it and rushed out of the room. When I reached bathroom , I could actually feel so many blood and I got to know the freaking egg inside me burst out . Every other day , I would run to my mom even when I got a scratch but knowing I was on my periods  I didn’t but just stayed outside like for  half an hour which felt like eternity thinking about useless things. Then my mom comes to me and asks ,” Still Stomach Pain.” I didn’t replied. She asked me once , twice , thrice but still I was mute . Then she suddenly says, “ Periods “. With tears all over my eyes , I nodded yes. She passed me some sanitary pads and taught me about using it although I knew it from the class. It was already 9 pm and that time my mom was even frustrated and stressed out than me. Then, the worst thing happened , as expected with periods comes taboos and ritual . Now this daddy’s princess is no more a princess , this god like daughter is impure. I knew all of these because I have seen something like this happening to my cousin a year ago. I cant even see my brothers ,my dad and uncles now . My eyes were full of tears but what can I do, My mom phoned a neighbor{far away relatives} and I will be living there for a week now. I  have never even lived for a day in others house  and now only I could do is  feel pity on myself. I didn’t go to school the next day as I was not able to figure out about that nightmare of my life. Two days passed , now I felt like I need to adjust myself and told my mamu that I was going to school the next day. The third day , I bathed  and went to school. And In the seventh day ,  woke up at 4 and bathed and before anyone woke up, I reached my home , my mom laughed at me seeing how much I missed home. Then it felt like every usual day. God came back to me, this daddy’s princess survived happily. After that second, third ,fourth and every months I go through these time 4 days in my life. I don’t have to go anywhere now but still there are something that I feel creepy to follow but still do. Every month during this time , I promise myself that I will be the last generation going through these rituals. I have cramps, sleepless nights ,  the mountains of pain, tears but still at last I proudly can say I  am still living. They come and go promising to come next month. Only thing I liked about my first period was when my Mom explained ,How much my dad and brothers missed me during that time.  Within myself I also replied ,” I missed you even more.”

Dear Terrified Sisters,

Don’t fear periods. Everyone hates period but they are the new beginnings of your life. Its not the stinky stain or blood but a fairy dust coming out from you so that you can hold small angels like you for 9 months in your womb to welcome them  in this beautiful  world. Periods suck but You can help period calm by taking it easy. Be proud of having a period because that’s when you realize there’s also a superhero inside you who can go through every pains, struggles of life . Just stay healthy ,adopt healthy ways with some good food . You will feel blessed . Periods don’t make any women impure  . You always have a god inside you so feel proud to be a girl. Be prepared and help others know about it. Don’t fear but stay Strong. Period turns your life into gloomy time but it depends on you ‘Bloomy or Gloomy.’

To all the peoples out there , Menstruation is not only about hate  ,impurity, orthodox and blood rather its about Motherhood and a strength of a woman. Don’t feel ashamed to talk about periods because it’s a natural process. Don’t look down upon any women on her periods but help her through her PMS(period mood swings). Make her feel happy because ; IF NO PERIODS THEN THERE IS NO ONE NOT EVEN YOU.

- REJINA KC